The Male Species

For those of you who know Steve Harvey, the talk show host, he advises women never to sit at the bar alone if they want to attract the right kind of man.

On one of my solo dinners, I decided to eat at the bar of the restaurant instead of at the table. As I entered the restaurant, the hostess approached me and asked, “Table for one?” I immediately replied that I preferred sitting at the bar. The bartender asked what I’d like to drink and proceeded to take my dinner order. It was late, much of the dinner crowd had left. At the corner of my eye I noticed a younger gentleman sitting at the end of the U-shaped bar. After a few minutes I heard him moving to my side of the bar. He sat down 2 seats away from me.

Eating alone can feel awkward. I tend to look around me and observe the crowd or like this evening, listen to the idle conversation between the bartender and the man, 2 seats away from me. They were commenting on the sport’s game playing on the overhead screen and making small talk (quite uninteresting, actually).

Feeling a little bored, I decided to open a dialogue with the fine man sitting 2 seats away from me.

My opening line was corny. “You must come here often”, I remarked. He immediately turned in in his seat to face me, replying, “As a matter of fact, I do come by from time to time for a drink”.

He wasn’t wearing a wedding ring. He was well dressed, tall, dark and handsome probably mid to late forties.

I enjoy listening to people’s stories and I have a way of making people speak about themselves. Everyone has a story. On this evening I decided to hear his.

When I asked if he was single, he hesitated. After a short pause, he replied “not quite single yet but separated and still living with my soon to be ex wife”. He had young children and did not want them to suffer the effects of divorce. He and his wife had an interim arrangement. They were allowed to take time off alone; tonight was his night so he stopped in for a beer before going to watch the late showing of the movie “John Wick”.

We talked about divorce the effects on the children, etc. The time came for him to leave for the movie theatre, but he didn’t want to because he was enjoying my company, he said. Would I like to join him, he asked. My reply was, “Why not!”

Every woman is warned of going out alone with strangers and to take precautions if you do. For example, let a friend know where you are going and have them call you at some point during the evening to make sure you are in no danger. A friend of a friend once advised me not to take such risks ’cause “the stranger could kill me and cut me into tiny pieces”. Her vivid description of the danger made me explode with laughter.

Nonetheless, I took a calculated risk and agreed to go to the movies with the gentleman. The movie theatre was walking distance. He paid for my ticket and offered to buy me popcorn, which I kindly declined. We sat quietly during the movie. He got up at one point to make a phone call. A fleeting thought came through my mind, what if he just called someone to meet him outside in order to kidnap me and chop me into little pieces? LOL!!!

On our way out of the movie theatre he complimented my perfume. He told me how throughout the movie he was distracted by my fragrance; would I like to join him for a nightcap? It was late, our options were limited. Going downtown was not a good idea especially with a stranger. He then said we could continue our conversation in the car. Oh no,no,no,no that was not an option either. I’ve been on too many dates to know what comes after. “How about your house”, was his next suggestion. That was definitely, out of the question.

We walked to my car, he asked for my number and kissed me on the cheek, then we parted.

When I arrived home, a text message from him, awaited me. The last part of his message read, I wish you invited me over. You would never forget it. That is for sure”.

Why do some men automatically assume you will have sex with them just because you were friendly and shared a pleasant conversation? I guess Steve Harvey is truly an expert, when it comes to the male species and his advise to women.

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