Expectations and Disappointments

This Thursday was Valentine’s Day, the day of expectations and disappointments.

When I was in elementary school, there would be the exchange of Valentine cards among the students. Each child would keep count on the number of cards they had received; the more you received, the more you felt noticed and loved by your classmates. I never got many cards but enough to know I had some friends. Some children were not so lucky. As I grew older, I dreamed of the day I would have a boyfriend that would give me a card, chocolates and roses. Alas, the most I got from my fiancée ,which lived overseas, was a Valentine card. When we were married, I can’t say I recall being pampered that way. You see, my husband was not considerate when it came to Valentine’s day, nor on any other occasion, for that matter. Any gift or flowers given to me for an occasion was because my older sister would urge him to do so and she would also take care of it. The first time he went out and ordered roses for me, by himself, was after a huge fight where we both started hitting each other. He felt bad, thus long stemmed roses arrived the next day.

A few years ago, on the morning of Valentine’s Day, I woke up questioning why I felt disappointed that I had no special man to bring me flowers. It was at that moment, that it came to me, why did I need a man to buy me flowers on this occasion? It’s a day of recognizing and appreciating the people we love in our lives not only boyfriends, life partners and husbands. That day I decided to purchase my own roses, (now a yearly tradition).

This year, I purchased 12 white roses which I always pick up at the grocery store. They are less expensive than at the florist.

I went to the pharmacy near my home to pick up a box of chocolates to bring to my esthetician and friend Maia, who never accepts a tip. At the pharmacy, there were several men in the Valentine section picking up chocolates for their loved one. It was amusing to watch them. They picked up the first heart shaped chocolate box they spotted and quickly left. Was it embarrassing to be seen selecting chocolates for the woman in their life or were they simply in a hurry to leave and be done with this task.

Most men know that women appreciate this type of demonstration of affection although they don’t expect the same in return. On his show, Thursday night, Jimmy Kimmel made reference to Valentine’ s Day and said that men would much prefer that their woman offered them sex instead. LOL!!!!

This Valentine Day, I did receive a card , a beautiful single rose and a box of chocolates from a special friend.

When there are no expectations, there are no disappointments and maybe some pleasant surprises.

4 thoughts on “Expectations and Disappointments

  1. Giusto, ci facciamo del male “aspettando” che ci regalino fiori o regali per le diverse occasioni.
    Credo fortemente nel detto ” chi fa per se fa per tre”. Che cosa più bella di prendersi cura di se stessi….autoregalarsi quel che ci piace?
    Ho sempre visto il regalo…. da parte di un uomo ,come un’”attenzione” per avere qualcosa in cambio di sesso.
    Che bella cosa la spontaneità!


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